The other side of the story about adult content

Let’s talk about something that gets a lot of judgment—but is actually more nuanced than we give it credit for.

When we talk about “adult content,” it’s easy to reduce the conversation to shame or secrecy. But what if we zoomed out for a moment and asked a deeper question:

What are you actually looking for when you press play on pornography?

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If you're seeking something that genuinely feels good and helps you connect to your own turn-on—without shame or isolation—that’s worth naming. For many people, visual stimulation offers a private, low-pressure space to explore desire. To learn. To get inspired.

Here’s what that might look like:

✔ Discovering new kinks or interests you didn’t even know you had

✔ Feeling turned on by seeing different body types experiencing pleasure

✔ Getting a sense of what it might be like to try something new with a partner

✔ Exploring fantasies you’d never act on real life, but are still part of your erotic landscape

✔ Witnessing vocalizations, movement, or dynamic energy that helps you express more during sex

For folks who are shy or unsure how to embody their own pleasure, this kind of content—especially when it’s ethically made and centers enthusiastic consent—can be surprisingly empowering. Ethical adult content can be a tool for discovery, not disconnection.

And of course, all of this depends on context. Not everything labeled “adult” is healthy or consensual. There are serious issues around coercion, exploitation, and unrealistic portrayals of intimacy—and they deserve real conversations too.

But today, I want to make space for the other side of the story: that exploration can be a path to connection. That enjoying pleasure-focused porn can help some people learn more about themselves, their voice, and their desires.

If you're curious how to untangle this topic in your own life or explore pleasure in a supported, grounded way—I’d love to talk.

📆 Book a free virtual coffee chat to explore 1:1 or 1:2 work together. Whether you’re feeling stuck or just curious what’s next for your intimacy journey, this is your no-pressure invitation to start the conversation.

XO,

Jane


PS. If you're ever curious about what I'm up to, we should be Facebook or Instagram buddies. 
^ Both of those links take you directly to a post with my musings about the show Dying for Sex on FX/Hulu. Spoiler: I highly recommend watching it.