It’s a scene that repeats daily in American kitchens. Tensions of the day find themselves there. The dishwasher (if you’re lucky enough to have one) is the epicenter of negotiation. It’s ground zero for relationship negotiation and discord. And interesting that when couples don’t have a dishwasher, they assume it’ll solve all their problems. #wrong
Why do these tiny things go nuclear? What is it about the bowls in the upper shelf and the glassware on the sides that sends our blood pressure through the roof and beyond?
Headline: “Man Dies During Domestic Dispute. His Cryptic Last Words - ‘It was the cereal bowl.”
Such a waste.
What can you do to get rid of all the tension? I can think of a few things - trips to the coast & beautiful romantic evenings, but outside the obvious, can you change your energy & attitude about the small things without a lot of planning and a big investment?
I think you can.
They tell us not to sweat the small stuff. I disagree.
I think we should focus on the small stuff and the big stuff will take care of itself. The little things that kill us with a lifetime of minor insults - the tiny paper cuts of living with a partner. Who may eventually become just roommates if you don’t figure out how to manage these small stresses.
It should be so easy. It’s the stuff we tell our small and grown up kids to “just handle.” But it’s not happening for us as legit adults.
My advice? Be polite. Treat your partner even better than you would treat your very best girlfriend or guy friend.
Next time you go to Safeway, buy him/her/them candy in the checkout line. When you get home, put it under your partner’s pillow.
Think of little things you can do to show them you love and adore them.
It’s worth it in the end.