Need A Patch Job?

​The blue jays exploded onto the scene.

They were like a flock of Elton John fan boys dressed in gaudy feathers. Out of nowhere, our front yard was filled with crazy blue birds swooping and dive bombing.

Jim said, “Damn blue jays. I can’t catch a break with this lawn. They’re eating all the seeds.” 

The blue jays were having a midmorning feast.
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Jim spent hours working on the lawn over the weekend. He spread grass seeds onto all the dry areas. He watered. He waited. And nothing. 

We have a tiny lawn. It’s surrounded by garden beds and they’re filled with lupin and yummy smelling flax. But the lawn, yuck. It had patches of yellow grass in places that should be verdant green. And this isn’t even related to our dog, for once. Something went wrong with the lawn and we didn’t know what it was. 

We asked Alex what the problem could be. Alex is our gardener. He’s one of those people who’s both delightful and horrifying to know.

He mulches or weeds one week, and flies down mountain slopes trying to kill himself the next. Knowing Alex is like watching Nascar without the political controversy. Will he make the next turn? 

But even though he makes us nervous, Alex knows his stuff. He’s a professional lawn guy. 

Alex checked the sprinkler system. Fine.
He checked the water timing? Nothing.

All the elements for success were there. What was the problem?
Alex made the diagnosis. 

It was thatch. 
Plain and simple. 
Our lawn has simply gotten stale. 
We needed a patch job. 

Old grass was keeping Jim’s grass seed job from taking root and growing into the beautiful lawn we both desired.   Sometimes stuff gets stale. It’s in the way of growth. Like thatch. 

Like spending 4 months stuck at home during COVID. Stale. Nothing new. Everything’s the same. It’s so boring that even an Olive Garden Date Night would be epic. 

Alex got rid of the thatch. He pulled it all out with a cool gardener kind of rake. He put down new soil over heat resistant seed. He started up the sprinkler. 

He’s the lawn guy. He knows what he’s doing. 

Maybe you can relate. If your relationship is filled with something stale, you might need a professional patch job, too. Sometimes, you can’t see what’s in the way of new growth. You might need professional help, just like we did.  Relationships are meant to be satisfying and lush, not stale or patchy. 

If this is you, find a professional to clean things up and get  growing again. I’m hosting individual (COVID-safe) couples’ retreats. Maybe that would be good. Or get a good book about rekindling desire. Email me and I’ll send you a list of resources.  Maybe you should read erotica (or even better, write it yourself). Whatever you need, don’t give up on what you really desire, no matter how dead things look. 

Ready to spend a (virtual) overnight with me and figure out how to make your relationship satisfying and amazing? Email me at jane@drjaneguyn.com.