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Relationship Blogs

The 3 Words That Will Save Your Relationship

11/10/2020

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​People are fighting with their partners like Trump supporters and CNN at a rally. Things are completely off the rail.

I can’t complain because it’s great for “business” but I hate knowing how tough things are right now for so many of us.

We’re trying to balance it all out. And to be understood. So we argue our points louder and louder. 

​We interrupt because we already know what he/she/they are going to say even before they say anything. And somehow - they never get it, ‘never appreciate us, are totally insensitive. They obviously don’t care. And we can’t do any effing thing right.


It seems impossible. And frankly, when we’re communicating like this, it is.


But when you use these three magic words, everything will change in your relationship almost overnight. Honest.


The three words are
​

Tell.
Me.
More.



That’s it. Tell me more. No questions. No defensive answers. Just plain and simple “Tell Me More.”


Your partner: “You don’t ever support me or listen to me. I feel lonely all the time.”
You: “Tell Me More.”


Your partner: “You didn’t appreciate the fact that I did all the grocery shopping in a damn mask!”
You: “Tell Me More.”


So easy. So non-confrontational. Open. Accepting. And all of a sudden, your partner who was locked and loaded for a FULL ON FIGHT is a little bit softer and easier. He/she/they wonder why you’re not ready to take them out at the knees. It’ll be unnerving. A totally new concept.


And when you stand down and listen to their concerns, you’ll learn a whole lot about how they’re feeling. It’ll be that much easier for you to empathize and do things that make their life more satisfying and pleasant.


Pay it forward. It’s Relationship Communication Karma kind of thing. Give them the Tell Me More treatment and see what happens. Because, you know what? Tell Me More-ing is catching.


Pretty soon you might be getting a Tell Me More from your partner. No matter how stubborn and ornery he/she/they are.


Get back to me here or by email and tell me about how it works for you. I live for this stuff. 
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