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Whenever she told a friend about her idea, her friend looked at her in disbelief.
She said “You’re going to let your husband get with another woman? That’s the most ridiculous idea I’ve ever heard!” She read the Ethical Slut. And article after article about “consensual non monogamy.” She thought she knew the risks - STDs, emotional entanglement, jealousy. Even scheduling issues. Armed with all the information she could find, she decided to talk to her husband about it one night. “With your permission, I’d like to have some new sexual experiences. And I’m okay with you having some new sexual experiences, too.” When he responded, he asked her if he was doing something wrong as a lover. “Do you want someone else because I’m not satisfying you?” “Oh, of course not!” she said. “You’re a wonderful lover! But, I’ve had lots of fantasies about new sexual adventures, maybe even with another woman. I’d like to explore our sexuality together.” They had a passionate marriage. They communicated well. Even though she was madly in love with him, she wanted to try some new things. He wanted to support her. And he was intrigued. That night, she woke up with a start. She’d had a very powerful dream. In the dream, she was sitting on the couch in her living room holding a can of rocket fuel. EXPLOSIVE was written on the side of the can. She held the can carefully at first. Then she tipped it over and started pouring it onto the carpet beneath her feet. The rocket fuel spread quickly across the room. It covered every inch of the floor to overflowing. She woke up from the dream in a cold sweat. She knew they were playing with something powerful. Something that required careful handling. The next day, she googled “sex coaching” and booked a consultation call with me. Even though they had lots of information and a great relationship, they needed help. Good idea. When you’re spicing things up, get all the support you can.
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