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 Maybe last week you read my email about that adorable little old lady who came into the office ready to have sex again. At 81 years old, she’d lost her dentures and used a cane to get around, but sex was still on her mind.
That little lady is my hero. Not because sex is required for people in their 80’s, but because she’d identified her desire and reached out to me for help. If you missed my post, check it out here.
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 An 81 year old woman walked into my office recently. Her primary care doctor sent her to me. The driver from assisted living drove her. She wore a shampoo and set hairdo, a perfectly pressed cardigan with sensible shoes and walked with a cane. She didn’t have any teeth - couldn’t find her dentures that morning.
She had that endearing way of talking. Too much gum. Not enough teeth. I saw my future - a little old lady who somehow couldn’t find her teeth. In the sex coach’s office at 80+ years old.  One night soon after they started dating, she told her friends at Book Club that she’d won the multimillion dollar “Powerball of Cock”. There was something about her new bf’s body (and what he did with it) that drove her wild in the bedroom. The act of intercourse wasn’t usually her thing, but with this guy it was different. He was all that and a bag of chips.
The morning after Book Club, she was a little embarrassed about how much she’d divulged. When it came to sex, she wasn’t the biggest talker in the room. But, Book Club was a place for secrets.  They’d been married over 10 years at this point – a beautiful couple with 2 darling kids, an eight-year-old boy who lived to play Minecraft and a girl in kindergarten who couldn’t wait to get outside to the creek when she woke up in the morning. They knew they were very lucky to have such a darling family and they were grateful.
 I can’t hear.
I figured that out last Memorial Day at a workshop. My friend Kim Keller led a group of women in exploration about who we are as sexual beings. It was delicious, powerful, and transformational. We cried and hugged and shared all sorts of wonderful feelings. And I realized that I couldn’t hear what women on the other side of the circle were saying. |
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